I can proudly say I’ve been keeping my writing and art goals of the year steady and strong. I know it’s only fifteen days into the year, but since I’ve always been more of a “large” goal achiever instead of a “small” goal achiever this is really good for me.
I haven’t had this much structure and discipline for my creativity since, well, high school and university.
The only difference is that I’ve taken the reins of responsibility and I am now holding myself accountable for everything I peel out of my imagination and choose to stick to paper or type out on a screen. Since I’m older (I graduated from university seven years ago and from high school twelve years ago), disciplining and conditioning my mind for writing and art is giving my brain a much needed stretch out – like yoga for the brain.
I’m no longer relying on professors or teachers to press deadlines and requirements in my face.
I’m no longer trying to manipulate my work to achieve some sort of letter grade or percentage, I’m just letting my work fall flat on its face.
If someone comes along and picks it up, dusts off its shoulders and then examines it, deciding they actually find any sort of value in it – good on them.
If someone comes along and finds no value in it at all – also, good on them.
Separating my enthusiasm and love for art from what I feel my enthusiasm and love for art should be by some other standard or measure has been one of my greatest achievements.
A lot of my poetry that I wrote in the past never saw the light of day, and nearly all of it I would delete or even tear up and throw away. I would write with the impression that I had someone hovering right over my shoulder, like some sort of chaperone guarding and judging whatever creation would surface from my brain to my pen onto the paper.
Now I’m my own chaperone throwing caution to the wind. But … also making sure to pick it back up to make sure it’s okay from time to time in order to give myself a safe and steady push in a positive direction. 🙂