Poetry from Brianna Dawn.

to spare oneself

i wake up, sleep some more –
inadequate.
i put on makeup, brush my hair –
pitiful tired eyes.
i go to work, work some more –
not good enough.

i tell myself all of these lies.
if it’s foolish, or wise
i don’t really know.

insufficient knowledge
not really ever knowing myself
since i change into an older me every day.

i try to spare myself of harsh words
from others, by saying them to
myself all of the time, anyway.

so they won’t come as a surprise
and i won’t react to them with
embarrassing tears in my eyes.

i tell myself all of these lies.

but i grow, i’ve grown in my thoughts.

they were and always will be lies
because no one else has said
them, have never said them at all
so they couldn’t be the truth.

they’re only my lies told
to comfort me in my anxiety
of an anticipated fall.

___
written by Tiny Fawns for daily prompt: meager

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